Rule Five: It is a common misconception that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early." Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls.
This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter.
Rule 1 : If you pull into my driveway and honk, you better be delivering a package because you're sure not picking anything up.Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool.Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. On issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a wadi near Khandahar.Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you.Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.