His unavailability was a turn-on, the danger of it all.
But it was upsetting because we couldn't do normal couple things.
Situations are a lot more nuanced than they appear to be.
Sure, some people in the world don’t have the best intentions, but I do believe they are few and far between. He's also 10 years older than me, which made me look up to him.
Ask any heartbroken partner from a relationship split apart due to infidelity: Affairs can be bad news.
That being said, they’re also hella complicated, yet often blamed on the evil “home-wrecking” woman, who surely must be out to steal someone’s man and cause as much damage as possible.
I think these women, myself included, truly believe that they can make this work without anyone getting hurt and they truly do care not only for the husband but also his family. At work, he gave me praise on my performances, which made me feel validated in my role and made me feel more competent. Our relationship went from mentor to friend to lover.
Finally, I gave up and believed him when he said she would be ok with it.There was obviously chemistry, but I was a little uncomfortable at first about him being married, which continued into our relationship.He assured me that his wife was cool with it and that they had a 'don’t ask don’t tell' relationship.Our relationship started off with him being my mentor and helping me at work. He brought me to the house he lived in with his wife (she moved out and across the country) and that made me uncomfortable.I saw evidence of the fighting they had (holes in the wall, broken banisters), and I just wanted to take care of him.