Divorces, like men, come in all shapes, sizes, and situations.
Sometimes there are amicable divorces; sometimes there are epic divorces that last years and years with lots of “collateral damage.” But if you’re dating recreationally and not considering him as a long-term partner, then these questions might not matter as much, since you’re not concerned with long-term compatibility.
You probably have a million questions on your mind. With that said, if you meet someone you’re really attracted to, but the ink on his divorce papers hasn’t yet had time to dry, you are going to need to approach some things differently if you want to minimize the risk of getting your heart broken.You have to acknowledge and be aware of the facts of the relationship, such as his availability when it comes to his caring for the kids, his financial obligations to his ex (if any), and where he is right now with his emotional readiness to date other people.If you go into your relationship hoping for spontaneous weekend trips to Cabo or Vegas, but his weekends are about shuttling his daughters to music lessons, soccer practice or helping with a science project, you will be disappointed. And with regard to his readiness to date other people, be aware of, or to try to, discern whether he just wants to date for fun right now or if he is looking to date with the intention of finding a long-term partner.It’s good to know what to expect, because the custody arrangement might affect how often you get to spend time with your partner, and how to pace the relationship.Knowing whether your partner still shares property with his ex, or whether he needs to pay alimony, will help manage your expectations when it comes to his financial obligations.